Getting to Know Me

Getting to know me is not an easy task.  Most people, who first meet me, think that I am some shy quiet guy.  So if you only see me once or very rarely then you have no idea who I am.  It's funny how people act when they think that you are prim and proper.  And then you drop a bomb on them.  I usually say some off the wall stuff.  Mostly one-liners meant to catch you off guard and crack you.  I succeed most of the time.  But there are times when I hear the crickets chirp.  When people are first getting to know me and I crack my first joke, the recipient normally looks at me in shock.  It takes few jokes for them to loosen up around me.  I'm not sure what gives them the impression that I'm so square.  I know I speak differently than most.  I try to use vocabulary.  Also, when I do things I'm all in.  I don't half-ass anything.  Sometimes, I get the feeling that people think I'm snobbish.  I'm not.  I just have things to do and I prefer to get them done.   My whole working life people have told me to "smile" or that I look "mad".  Huh? I usually focused on my task.  I think my mouth sits a certain way and people perceive it as a frown.  I have tried to explain this to people but they don't buy it.  I think "Whatever.  Have another energy drink and go back to wherever from which you came."  When people are around me enough, I think they find me as quick-witted and are now shocked when I don't have a quick quip to give.
I enjoy making people laugh.  It is part of my make-up.  In a prior blog I mentioned the Simon Birch story.  I didn't tell the story because it didn't work in that blog but here it will show you how part of my brain works.  I was watching the movie, Simon Birch with Grechen, Shawn and Jennifer some years ago.  Towards the end, young Simon dies leaving his friend behind.  It was at his point that Gretchen and Jennifer are bawling over this movie.  And then I chime in with "Well, now he can boink the mother."  (yes I know inappropiate but still funny).  And that one line has become legend.  It's like the scrawny short kid hitting a homerun in the playoffs.  Oh wait.  That was me too.   You know it's a legendary line, when during any movie, someone will quote it.  I wish I had a recording of the reaction.  Two grown women crying over a movie and then an uncaring heartless man spurts something out that changed the atmosphere.  Priceless!